we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I looked at my own cervix.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
