just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize