Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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