Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Randomize
