with your own penis?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
