Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
