at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
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