That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
