did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
