Texts From Last Night

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  (510): View more from California

  The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.

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  (510): The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker. http://tfl.nu/49dy
  Replies (25) Good night (4261) Bad night (688)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.

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  (732): i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you. http://tfl.nu/3kwo
  Replies (18) Good night (5063) Bad night (760)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".

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  (201): My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince". http://tfl.nu/a6t0
  Replies (34) Good night (5755) Bad night (6468)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight

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  (770): just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight http://tfl.nu/b8vr
  Replies (38) Good night (4533) Bad night (1472)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover

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  (763): i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover http://tfl.nu/a65k
  Replies (13) Good night (2806) Bad night (1142)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face

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  (847): I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face http://tfl.nu/ydcz
  Replies (13) Good night (4286) Bad night (777)
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  (805): View more from California

  The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break

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  (805): The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break http://tfl.nu/smih
  Replies (3) Good night (2784) Bad night (782)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background

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  (403): we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background http://tfl.nu/seul
  Replies (10) Good night (2255) Bad night (674)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina

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  (865): it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina http://tfl.nu/yy9c
  Replies (16) Good night (2250) Bad night (832)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.

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  (705): My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class. http://tfl.nu/olmr
  Replies (16) Good night (2006) Bad night (378)
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  (646): View more from New York

  Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities

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  (646): Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities http://tfl.nu/7b3i
  Replies (4) Good night (813) Bad night (408)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.

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  (240): He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at. http://tfl.nu/i197
  Replies (5) Good night (634) Bad night (343)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?

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  (336): Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex? http://tfl.nu/6zbe
  Replies (5) Good night (756) Bad night (479)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.

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  (830): You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations. http://tfl.nu/eber
  Replies (3) Good night (602) Bad night (425)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to

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  (978): They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to http://tfl.nu/mjdy
  Replies (6) Good night (461) Bad night (603)

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