Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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