if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
