My sheets look like a crime scene.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
