Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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