Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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