My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
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