I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
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I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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