i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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