She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
