I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
