Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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