what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
