I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
