I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
