Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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