i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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