God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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