you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
