all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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