i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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