This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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