sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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