you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
