I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
