My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
