..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize