take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize