I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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