then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Im part way to drunk.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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