This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
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I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
it's great music for shaving your balls
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
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You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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