i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
