he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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