I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
