people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
