What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize