Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
