Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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