Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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