hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
