did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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