Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Your tits are I can't wait for
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
