No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
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She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
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I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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